-Sunday, March 28, 2010-

Finally realised it. It's true.

If only I can turn the clock back.

*Chinyee

- 5:45 PM ♠

-Saturday, March 27, 2010-

12.38am omg.

School was okay. managed to finish my 10 chinese mindmaps YAY. My neatest piece of work and the one which I spent the most time in. Super proud of it LOL.

Left for HQ at 1pm. 5 hours there and had only 2 rehearsals with music o.o. but oh well. Came back and left for KAP at 8.05pm, so not surprising when I reached home at 10 plus. Hate myself now cos I'm hungry again-.-

Sleeping soon! Tuition tmr.

*Chinyee

- 12:33 AM ♠

-Thursday, March 25, 2010-

Shouldn't be blogging now. But I guess a little while is okay.

School today, and I stayed back for Project's Day. Reached home at 7.00 plus. After bathing I just got this weird feeling. It's like you just don't feel quite right (I'm not sick btw), just feeling uneasy. I'm also not sure how to describe it well, so this is all I can say I guess.

On a side note, the term is kicking in again. Everyone's feeling the stress of school work, school tests, cca and etc. Keep on going okay. I know such things sometimes are inevitable, but nevertheless I know you'll pull through. So jiayou.

Am I really doing things right?

*Chinyee

- 9:28 PM ♠

-Wednesday, March 24, 2010-

Hey!! haha.

Ran 2.4km on Monday. 11.12 omgg. Must work harder already!
Tuesday, I played soccer from 5-7.
Today, I played soccer from 11-1.

Siao liao lol. And somemore I suck at soccer LOL. But who cares so long as its fun(:

Anywayy, I'm not emo okay haha! Don't worry (:

*Chinyee

- 10:25 PM ♠

-Monday, March 22, 2010-

this is unexpected. this cannot be doubted. this is unexpectedly, undoubtedly, difficult.

*Chinyee

- 11:16 PM ♠

-Sunday, March 21, 2010-

I'm going to try and convey what I want to say, but will you ever understand what I am really trying to get at?

*Chinyee

- 7:50 PM ♠

--

It's the last day of the holidays. omg time seriously flies. If only my homework does that too, but too bad it doesn't, so I'm stuck with either finishing it today, finishing it tomorrow and get scolded, or finish it on Tuesday and get scolded twice. Alternatively, I can be as cool-headed as Junda and just not do anything LOL. It's just dam fast, like 7 days ago I went for aoxiang outing and it signified the beginning, and now it's the end, and the beginning of Term 2.

Friday was full day training. We celebated Yingda's birthday and finished training at 4pm, playing soccer and going to Junction 8 after that. Window-shopping :D

Saturday I went for my chemistry tuition and saw my Pri 4 and 5 classmate o.o We like totally ignored each other or something, lucky Jamie still responded lol. Went to grandma's house again and sleeeep for 2 hours plus. Then at night I couldn't sleep early anymore and slept at 2am.

Today I went for my abacus class and I thought I screwed up my abacus competition LOL but apparently I got 3rd yay. I think this will be the best I ever get cos it's quite impossible to come anywhere near the 1st. And so here I am, finishing up my biology worksheet and preparing for school tomorrow.

Tomorrow's Napfa 5 items. Omg sia dam scared I'm totally not prepared for it :O

***

On a side note, the new timetable is out. It's quite crazy lol, 30 min recess ( when queuing up could be 15 minutes alread) and I have this 80min break on Tuesday, and a total of 110 min break on that day. Crazy lo haha.

20 more days to Affirmation Ceremony.

***
6.49pm.

Read Xinchuan's blog.

Just realise his blog is super, super, tense.

Dunno how to say, it's just he writes very short, but a lot of meaning.

Take yesterday's post for example.

"Ignorance killed the man. Ignorance is the murderer."

Profound to me, seriously.

*Chinyee

- 2:11 PM ♠

-Thursday, March 18, 2010-

Happy Birthday! ~

Happy Birthday MUM! I finally remembered my mum's birthday clearly! ( Lol serious I always not sure if its 20th or 18th) .Haha had an expensive lunch :O cos my dad and my sister were both busy and we couldn't have dinner together.

Short post, anyway if you're reading this, just saying that sometimes the truth shouldn't be distorted! Don't rename all good emoticons as yourself and bad ones as me when it's so obviously not true :D But if it makes you disilliusioned and happy for awhile I don't mind then ((:

---
4.36pm now. Just read and I got owned by her profound language! :O. But oh well.

Just thought of this random verb. Haha.

Mean Meaner Meanest Meandy.

---
4.50pm. I got owned again!
miserable, money-faced, mediocre, mean. All starts with m. wow (:
---
This post refers to no one in particular btw. If this somehow coincides with you I'm very sorry!

***********
我晓得，时间如雪，有时候覆盖一切。
Wow this line is dam cool lol, relating time as snow, covering everything. Meant to be a good thing I guess (:

*Chinyee

- 3:02 PM ♠

-Wednesday, March 17, 2010-

Training. Disappointing. But shan't talk about it.

After training, ate lunch poolside and went home. Reached at 2.30pm (: Slacked awhile and slept. omg this is like the first time I had an afternoon nap on a weekday since like, Sec 2 or smth LOL. After that I started on my QA challenge reflections, and put my songs on shuffle. Then it came to this song that Zhonghui sent me last year.

Lol no, I'm like dam no-life. I didn't and don't watch Naruto haha.

Kanashimi wo Yasashisa Ni means turning sadness into kindness btw(: Quite meaningful haha.

*Chinyee

- 7:12 PM ♠

-Tuesday, March 16, 2010-

14th March 2010

翱翔 outing! Fun but it felt unlucky LOL. Went Marina Barrage to have picnic, then there was mud. Quite fun lah haha, eating and flying kite and playing cards, then left for abacus exam and I was late! Sweating like shit and took the test lol. Later went Marina Square to eat with the rest, while started to think whether we should watch a movie or walk around. End up I was a bit sian lol. Started not feeling good and stuff. Left early in the end. Felt quite bad D: but at least the rest had fun at supper, so it wasn't too bad for me I guess.

15th March 2010

Training. I turned blacker LOL. But at least I'm not familiarised with almost all the drills. Went for QA challenge in the afternoon. Hopefully I did well! :D

16th March 2010
I went to Science Centre at 8.00am in the morning for the Singapore Amazing Flying Machine Competition. The atmosphere was like a bit intense and a bit sian LOL, but it was kinda sad lah that we were fixing things till the last minute. We wasted our first try cos of the rudder at the end which blocked the launcher, meaning we couldn't even find out if we had other problems. It was no surprise we only flew 1m. Later on, our plane only flew 6.51m, which is still a very low distance.

Considering all the calculations Tingkai has done, I guess it was really negligance on my part. I kinda wasn't that precise I guess, and stuff, and I never thought about what might happen. Our plane was also rather fragile. Well, I guess I can only learn from this then.

After that, went to find Louis, Tiet Ho and Keith at city hall to eat New York New York, then we walked around, ate ice-cream at Macs, and went home.

Just as I thought I could reach home at 4pm, it turns out I didn't bring my house keys LOL. So I spend 3 hours at the library doing homework and reading books. Quite productive (: and with the free aircon. Maybe I should go there more often(:

其实，在人生中我们所面对的事情，真的令我摸不着头脑。当我们以为它非常简单时，原来背后不是这样。当我们把事情想象得非常复杂时，原来它只是个简单的问题。我猜想，想一次就能破解事情的复杂性，并不是件那么容易的事。

*Chinyee

- 10:22 PM ♠

-Friday, March 12, 2010-

晴天。

"刮风这天，我试过握着你手，但偏偏，雨渐渐，大到我看你不见。
好要多久，我才能在你身边，等待放晴的那天也许我会比较好一点。
从前从前，有个人爱你很久，偏偏风渐渐把距离吹得好远。
好不容易，又能再多爱一天，但故事的最后你好像还是说了，拜拜。”

Maybe, it's really time to wait for the day when all the troubles clear up.

On a side note, the last day of sabaticcal today. Did a skit and I guessed the whole thing was kinda fun. The venturing outside to Sungei Buloh Nature Reserve, Bukit Timah Nature Reserve and the Nee Soon place wasn't such a bad idea after all(: Maybe I should become a trainer next time haha. Training was quite fruitful (hopefully from my perspective).
AND we celebrated Xinren's birthday! :D

*Chinyee

- 11:07 PM ♠

-Thursday, March 11, 2010-

Didn't want to post this on facebook.. But yea. Just a short note (:

"Trapping myself within. Unable to help myself, much less help others."

Nothing much actually, basically meaning like I'm stuck now, unable to solve my own problems and definitely not being able to help others. Though some others have troubles, I guess I'm not really the kind who can help them.

Not yet. Maybe soon (:

*Chinyee

- 8:20 PM ♠

-Tuesday, March 09, 2010-

Monday - 8th March 2010

Happy Birthday Xinren!
Happy Birthday Betrick!

Got into "Nature Red in Tooth and Claw". Spent quite a bit time trying to get the cluster students, though in the end we split evenly across the groups lol. So Zachary and I were teamed with someone from Assumption English School. And they're dam lucky lah the next day got half day and they get to leave early too :D But I can't cos I had SAFMC presentation :O

Tuesday - 9th March 2010

Happy Birthday Taeyeon! (:

Today was the competition, took a taxi there at 8.15am or something like that, reached there and ate breakfast at Macs (: dam nice lol. Suddenly we had to rush back cos we thought it was our turn to present alr :O. I think overall we did quite well, impressing the judges especially with Liu Tingkai's imba calculation skills LOL. Hopefully we'll do well next week with our actual plane flight too.

Took a taxi back just in time to catch up for the half day people. Got my project's day settled (yay) and played soccer before going to bugis with Solomon, Jiansheng and Tanyang, supposedly to shop and see wondergirls LOL. But the bad thing is that Jiansheng didn't check properly and it turns out its a private event and it starts at 7pm, which makes sense cos there won't be many people free on a weekday afternoon LOL, so in the end we just shopped. They all bought something, I saw some nice clothes but I didn't buy cos I don't want to be reckless HAHA, so I guess I'll get it next time if I want. Also saw Bicycle cards o.o

So now, I'm back before 6pm haha. Quite a nice way to spend the afternoon actually lol.

---------------------------------------------------------

Just saw the photos Thamsy took and uploaded on facebook. Undoubtedly, they remind me of BSC again, the dorm, the snow, the food, everything. The happy memories and stuff. Well, it's quite amazing for me, that to think it has been 3 months since I first went BSC, and almost 2 months since I came back( or over 41 days ) and I can still remember BSC(:

*Chinyee

- 6:44 PM ♠

-Sunday, March 07, 2010-

Pingshuang just shared with me this very meaningful quote. (:

"It's better to be extremely happy for a short while ( even when you lose it ) than to be just okay for your whole life."

Hmm, a lot of ideas about this actually. For me, I think this is quite true, at least most of the time haha.

It's always good to be feel happy. The only thing about it is that once it dies down the feeling comes back again. But you have nothing to lose eh? If being okay is point 0, being happy is point 5, being happy just means you life revolves between points 0 and 5, but it will never go negative. I guess it's a really good thing after all. So I guess it's really a better idea to be extemely happy for a short while. I remember this from ncc - "Smile because it happened, not cry because it's over". It's better for something happy to have happened, at least there will be that memory inside you, that memory that something made you happy. And even when you're feeling okay, these thoughts may cheer you up occasionally too(:

All these are actually really simple because I didn't include other emotions such as sadness and stuff haha. But well, simplicity is great (: if life is either happy and/or okay, it'll be very ideal.

*Chinyee

- 9:30 PM ♠

--

This is a really nice song haha. I like the tune but the lyrics a bit not applicable now lol but still (:

I tried to be perfect,
But nothing was worth it,
I don’t believe it makes me real.
I thought it’d be easy,
But no one believes me,
I meant all the things I said.

If you believe it’s in my soul
I’d say all the words that I know
Just to see if it would show,
That I'm trying to let you know,
That I’m better off on my own.

This place is so empty,
My thoughts are so tempting,
I don’t know how it got so bad.
Sometimes it’s so crazy,
that nothing can save me,
But it’s the only thing that I have.

If you believe it's in my soul,
I’d say all the words that I know,
Just to see if it would show,
That I'm trying to let you know,
That I'm better off on my own.

On my own...

I tried to be perfect,
It just wasn't worth it,
Nothing could ever be so wrong.
It’s hard to believe me,
It never gets easy,
I guess I knew that all along.

If you believe it’s in my soul,
I’d say all the words that I know,
Just to see if it would show,
That I'm trying to let you know,
That I’m better off on my own.

*Chinyee

- 5:37 PM ♠

-Saturday, March 06, 2010-

First time blogging on a Saturday afternoon for 1 yr I think haha. Back from my first tuition of the year. Quite fruitful I guess. Transport back home was unusually long. 1 hour from Marine Parade back to Bedok omg. But lucky I can always listen to music (:

It's time to stop pinning my hopes so high. At the start, I thought perhaps things can be changed, especially by the looks of it. However, time and again, obstacles came and crashed onto me. But I continued trying, only to discover for myself the repeat of the cycle :O Well, maybe it's me. I havent been adopting the right method because it's not really me and I take some time to adapt. I don't deny that, but sorry but I think it has taken quite a toll. So maybe I should stop placing such hopes. But this doesn't mean I just die off. I'll keep on searching for different methods, except not to expect high returns( or any return) at the end of the day I guess.

Maybe, it's time to let go.

Anyway, Your Guandian Angel by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus is really nice (:

*Chinyee

- 1:18 PM ♠

-Friday, March 05, 2010-

A bit sad over some things in school again, but oh well nvm.

Cos there's half day today! HAHA. But I would also like to congratulate the JC2 people for having done exceptionally well this time for A levels! (:

Anyway after that played really a bit of soccer and went bowling(: I got last and first out of 4 ppl for 2 games LOL. But both games I didn't even exceed 100 points. Then played a bit of arcade and was busy trying to change money for 50 cent coins LOL. A lot of things to settle but oh well ~. Then we went to take bus to Bukit Batok to play soccer LOL and celebrate Qinjiang's birthday!!! And ate a really late dinner at West Mall. I didn't eat anything since breakfast omg.

Then I took the train back and reached home at 10pm. Though reached home quite late but it was still fun haha, so i guess it was worth it (: Then the best thing is.

tomorrow got chem tuition omg walao ):

Anyway, this song is nice. but a bit sad lol. a bit lah.

Thanks to Pingshuang for this lah okayy haha :D

*Chinyee

- 10:55 PM ♠

-Thursday, March 04, 2010-

Just realised, a lot of things that I want, a lot of things that I want to change, do not happen. Especially so in these 2 years. Quite a lot of examples actually ( even till now ), but I'll just name some, like my MSG and CCA stuff. For MSG, I kinda worked harder for Semester 2, though I did worse in Term 3. 4.33 was like the worst I ever got lah, and to think I put in more effort than Term 1 and 2. This was one of the most disappointing times, where studying is ( like Zhiwei said about some other things) not always a math equation. You add this and that, it doesn't necessarily give you a whole number that is bigger than the two things you put in. Well I suppose that's so, and although I still did better in end of years, it was definitely not what I wanted it to be. For EOY, I supposed 1. something would be a good MSG, but well I got 2.22. But I decided to be contented, after all I didn't really do well for past terms.

This year, I guess term 1's repeating itself. But I still have 3 more terms. Perhaps its time to change the way I study. It's probably not effective till the last few tests i took, so well.

Hopefully, just hopefully, things start getting better and I get the things I want and change the things to what I desired. Projects Day, MSG, NCC, SMRP. The top 4 things I need to settle this year, I suppose.

Tomorrow A level result release.. Hopefully got half day then can go company activity (((:

*Chinyee

- 6:20 PM ♠